Everything Fun is Forbidden

The walls here have already begun their slow, crumbling descent around my shoulders without your bubbling laughter to keep them upright.

This place is empty.

Each day my heart will beat less and I will suffocate more until I can hold you again and see your toothy grin.

One week.
A lifetime.

I promised to keep away all your monsters forever.
With my shouts into the darkness, I will keep that promise.
There is always darkness, my sweet boy.
Whether you’re here or not.

But when you’re not here,
who will keep away mine?

One week.
A lifetime.

There are days that I look at you, see the sweetness in your cheeks and my world stops and turns the other direction.
I think at times that I will explode.
That this heart will fly away from this body, that these ribs are too weak to hold in all the ways that I adore you.
Your ten toes, their dirt, and their wiggle? Those curling fingers?
I will eat up everyone a thousand times to hear that angel laughter spilling.
Time could cease movement tomorrow and all the years I would have with you then will still never be enough for me.
You are the best thing I will ever know, the only subject in which I will stand proficient.

You are love’s proof of existence.

Taught my son to give me a fist bump today. He started blowing it up on his own. Omg I love him.